FOOTBALL

🎸 The worst things in life come free to us

By now, you’ve probably seen the clip of Dua Lipa politely grimacing through a ukelele performance from a bloke who cornered her at Glastonbury.

And it turns out she wasn’t the only one plagued by an irksome man with a string instrument this week.

As if morale wasn’t bad enough in the England camp, Ed Sheeran popped up at their training base for an impromptu show after the ‘win’ over Slovakia.

In fairness, it looked like a lot of them enjoyed it, although the magic of the performance was slightly tainted by the fact it seemingly took place in the dilapidated games room of Butlin’s Bognor Regis.

One man who won’t have minded the miserable setting, though, is Connor Gallager. In an interview last season, the Chelsea midfielder named Sheeran’s A Team as one of his desert island tracks.

Sounding like he was sat in a GCSE oral exam, Conor explained:

And if England didn’t need any more motivation for Saturday’s quarter final against Switzerland, James Blunt has a message for the squad:

FOOTBALL

🥊 Carroll swinger

As England’s new generation of skilful number 10s struggle to create anything more than a fart, fans are pining for the days of Joleon Lescott hoofing it long to the big man up front.

And if they need any more flashbacks to the glory days of Euro 2012, Andy Carroll popped up this week with a reminder of his disruptive qualities.

The 35-year-old was on a date with his wife at godawful Mayfair restaurant Sexy Fish when he got into a scrap with a fellow diner which ended up with them rolling around on the street outside.

After tearing a chunk out of Andy’s t-shirt, the other bloke fled, leaving the former Newcastle man to yell “You fucking want some?” as he was restrained by strangers.

Would like to see Manuel Akanji and Granit Xhaka up against that…

Cut Through Noise with The Flyover!

The Flyover offers a refreshing alternative to traditional news.

We deliver quick-to-read, informative content across sports, business, tech, science, and more that cuts through the noise of mainstream media.

The Flyover's talented team of editors meticulously collects the day's most important news, ensuring you stay informed on top stories and equipped to win your day.

Join over 600,000 savvy readers and leaders who trust The Flyover to provide unbiased insights, sourced from hundreds of outlets!

Subscribe with One Click!

TENNIS

🫢 Still drey

"Look at that! Look at that! He's actually wounded himself,” shrieked Tim Henman as Andrey Rublev laid waste to his own thigh during his first round exit.

The Russian’s meltdown was certainly wild, although as all good Shotters know, it’s vanilla compared to the tantrums of his youth.

Last year Rublev described his utterly insane teenage rivalry with Daniil Medvedev, when losing one point would result in “three minutes of crying and racket throwing”.

Medvedev would scream abuse at random passers-by, while Rublev ate handfuls of clay in anger:

FORMULA 1

🦎 Tin foil Pat

When Netflix recruited Sky F1 pundit Danica Patrick for the latest series of Drive to Survive, they were hoping she’d inject a bit of controversy.

But it turns out Danica’s got more on her mind than Toto Wolff’s choice of nose cones.

On the latest episode of her podcast, Patrick and her clairvoyant guest, Elizabeth April, enjoyed a deep dive on “reptilians and the Galactic Federation”.

In an utterly batshit 70 minute chat, Danica nodded along as Elizabeth accused Justin Bieber and Adele of being lizard humanoids who will soon “accidentally shapeshift on stage in front of thousands”.

A few more highlights:

• 26,000 years ago, humans inhabited Atlantis.

• The Galactic Federation said 5G radiation is dangerous. That’s why the aliens wear space suits.

• Elizabeth has a friend who is a rocket scientist at NASA, and they say she's right about everything.

And if this all sounds a little far-fetched for you sheeple, the pair had a message to the cynics: “Want proof? Google it.”

TENNIS

🎤 The Notorious A.N.D.Y.

Andy Murray might be waving goodbye to Wimbledon, but that opens the door to a new life of Persil ads and flirting with his Strictly Come Dancing partner.

Or perhaps he will revive his short-lived rap career…

Back in 2009, Andy spat a verse on the song Autograph by former American doubles pair the Bryan brothers.

Also laying down some bars on that track? Novak Djokovic.

💉 Quick hits

🤮 Andy Murray puked in the back of a taxi after a big night celebrating his Wimbledon win in 2016.

📈 An England backroom team managed by Kieran Trippier thrashed the British press pack 7-0 thanks to two goals from assistant manager Jimmy Floyd Hasselbaink.

🛹 Team GB skateboarders Sky Brown, 15, Lola Tambling, 16, and Andy MacDonald, 50, have all been selected for the Paris 2024 Olympics.

✅ Jake Humphrey encouraged people to vote by instructing them to “put a tick in the box” on their ballot paper.

🔑 You can get The Upshot three times a week when you sign up for Upshot Gold

UPSHOT PODCAST

😈 Boom Boom Boris

He was the baby-faced megastar who won Wimbledon twice as a teenager.

But Boris Becker’s penchant for sex, mansions and dodgy dealings took him from centre court to the slammer.

From bonking in broom cupboards to suing people for “being cheeky”, we’re joined by comedian Josh Berry for the story of Boom Boom Boris…

AND FINALLY

🥙 Rat in mi kitchen

His rock solid midfield is giving Southgate nightmares, but 18 years ago, Switzerland manager Murat Yakin appeared as a kebab shop owner in a hip hop music video.

That's it for today. Thanks to Paul and Leonard.

🎁 Get one friend to sign up to The Upshot and we’ll give you Upshot Gold free for a month. Share via WhatsApp or copy your personal referral URL and share it via email or text: https://www.upshot.email/subscribe?ref=PLACEHOLDER