The absolutely mental 1930 World Cup in Uruguay

As fans queue for hours to shell out £12 for a 0% Bud in a Visa-sponsored white elephant, it’s easy to long for more innocent times.

Like the first World Cup in 1930, when refs trotted about the pitch in suits and ties, the Bolivians played in berets, the Romanian team was selected by the King, and Uruguay had a player with one arm.

The European sides sailed together across the Atlantic on board a Scottish steamship called Conte Verde, training on the top deck, and stopping off in Rio to pick up the Brazilians. Egypt, the only African team in the tournament, were supposed to join them, but they set off late and missed the boat.

When the tournament kicked off, Argentina quickly established themselves as the badboys.

During their 6-1 semi final win over the USA, a horror tackle left one of their opponents with a broken leg, and the game descended into a mass brawl.

An Argentine player knocked four teeth out of an American's mouth, and another ended up in hospital with injuries to his stomach.

And in possibly the most slapstick moment in World Cup history, the American manager rushed on to the field to confront the ref, tripped and smashed a bottle of chloroform he had in his pocket. The fumes knocked him unconscious and he had to be stretchered off.

Here he is being revived...

The final saw hosts Uruguay take on their hated neighbours Argentina, and more than 15,000 Argentine fans headed to Montevideo on board a steamship. But the ship got lost in heavy fog, and they arrived a day late to the news their team had lost, kicking off riots.

During the long boat trip back to Europe, Romanian midfielder Alfred Eisenbeisser Feraru fell ill, and was taken off to hospital when the boat stopped in Genoa.

The Romanian contingent continued without him, and arrived back in Bucharest to a hero's welcome. But when fans spotted Feraru wasn't with the party, a rumour spread that he had died in South America.

Even his distraught mother was convinced, and she soon made funeral arrangements, only for Feraru to walk through the door on the day on the day of the wake, causing his mother to faint on the spot.

Still, it wasn't all bad. Feraru recovered to compete for Romania in both figure skating and bobsleigh at the next Olympics.

What a time to be alive!