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Properly on the lash

Properly on the lash

Neymar's misguided prank

We drink blood every morning
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We drink blood every morning

Lewis Hamilton's fancy dress

Virtual girlfriends

Virtual girlfriends

Jamie O'Hara's romantic surprise

On a bender for a month
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On a bender for a month

Scott Carson's 4am scrap

Passed out in front of Hooters
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Passed out in front of Hooters

Anthony Joshua mugged off in Riyadh

I'll rip off both your ears

I'll rip off both your ears

Alan Shearer's sordid surprise

A hotbed for Chinese spies
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A hotbed for Chinese spies

Evangelos Marinakis' Pop Idol dream

I am the crazy one
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I am the crazy one

Jim Ratcliffe's theatre of streams

They failed to kill him

They failed to kill him

Davor Suker stealing antiques

Something of the nonce about him
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Something of the nonce about him

Jamie Vardy's having a party

Sheikh that ass

Sheikh that ass

A seedy bash in Dubai

Strapped and sedated
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Strapped and sedated

Monty Panesar in the corridors of power

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